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Subject:  Be Careful What You Wish For!

Ole, Lena, and Sven were lost in the north woods and were becoming desperate, having run out of food several days ago.  

It was winter, the snow was deep, their situation was looking very bleak. When Ole dug down into the snow to look for something to eat , he found an old lamp and upon rubbing it to get the snow off, a genie came out.

The genie said, "I am the great genie of the North and I can grant each of you one wish."

Ole said, "I vish I vas back on my farm."  Poof, Ole was gone.

Lena quickly said, "I vish I vas back on da farm wit Ole."  Poof, Lena was gone.

Sven sat there looking sad and the genie finally said, "What is your wish?" and Sven says, "Gee, I'm really lonely.  I vish Ole and Lena vas back here with me".   Poof!

Subject:   Why God?

One particular Sunday Ole was lying back in the hammock and, having just returned from church with Lena, he was feeling a little religious.

"God," said Ole, "vhen you made Lena, vhy did you make her so nice and round and so pleasant to hold?"

Suddenly a voice from above said, "So you would love her, Ole."

"Vell then vhy, oh vhy," asked Ole, "vhy Lord did you make her so stupid?"

"So she would love you, Ole", the voice replied

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